“How it feels to be a parent and how it feels to do the quotidian and often arduous task of parenting are two very separate things.”
– Jennifer Senior
During the last module, perhaps you were confronted with some unpleasant truths about motherhood. I hope you were able to find at least some pleasurable parts of ‘mom’ing if not mothering. Bear in mind that we also do not mother in a vacuum. There are expectations and stereotypes around and over us that inform our own mothering – even if we do not subscribe to them.
With this week’s module, I’d like to see if we can’t step outside of those pressures and focus on our own experience and intuition.
For the next little while, forget the labels of mother and mom.
Think of the relationship between you and your child(ren). Not whether it is good or bad or indifferent. How the two of you actually relate to one another. One to one.
Relive or reimagine a recent interaction if it helps. A bedtime routine. Doodling on a blank placemat.
What unconscious acts did you do? How did you anticipate your child’s needs? How did you encourage and enforce your child’s authentic self? How did you create and feel connection?
Answer these questions to get you started – or simply recognize and record your own instincts below.
Perhaps the scene wasn’t idyllic. In what ways did your instincts help you defuse the situation? How were you able to redirect your child? Or build a framework for a future positive outcome?
If not, how will your instincts adjust for a future similar encounter?
If we trust in our innate ability to care for our child, we will fall into the relaxed, passive, naturally occurring beauty and resonance of being a mother/mom. Naturally ourselves, we empower our children to be naturally themselves.
What naturally occurring parts of yourself enhance your way of being with your child?
What do you bring to the table? The essence of you . . .
Chopping Potatoes 